A Bad Role Model.

"If anybody knew that it was you and your house,

That I was creepin' to all the time,

I'd probably still do it,

'Cause I find it hard to keep you off of my mind."

Just wanna say that this has been written in the time span of two weeks. It was originally titled "What That Mouf Do?" but I realized I never posted link for my readers to read, and since then many things have happened. So this is a revamped version, I've added enough for two separate posts. Hope you understand and enjoy. 

Today marks my first full week living on campus and it's been.....interesting to say the least lol. 

K so today I went to get something out of my fridge and I look up and out the window and almost choke (pause). At first I thought it was a real person staring at me but it actually was a Jonah Hill cut out lmfao. I literally was like "What the hell?!" and of course my need to share news as such forced me to run out of my room and grab Alex and show him. Which reminds me, I should probably put up some decorations or something in my room lol. It looks so bare and its definitely not worthy of a Russian Prince like me. *giggles*

I've been getting to know my podmates more and more as the days go on and I think we are an interesting yet somewhat-volatile mix of people. I'm not Miss Cleo or Raven, but I can deff forsee some serious shit going down in the not-too-distant future. We are all mad chill and cool when we're ALL together, BUT everyone can see the division(s) happening, mainly between the guys and the girls. I myself find some people much more tolerable when certain other people are around or are not around. I hope that made sense lmao.

There's this one girl that no one really likes in here...I honestly don't know why. She seems tolerable and actually very generous. Still digging. 

I digress. One thing I hope everyone in this pod learns is that we all LIVE together. That means we will pretty much all always know each others business, well except the people who like never hang out in the pod with everyone else. Sometimes I laugh to myself because they'll try to act like something's a secret while everyone pretty much knows the gist of it.

See this Cold War really was kicked into gear when the guys told Kit Kat about our impressions of her. Really, I don't think she's a slut at all. Even if, it really isn't my concern. She got a little freaky side to her though, I find that interesting. She's mad fun to be around. 

I'm still on keeps-comments-to-self mode. Just observing and commenting to myself. And Markus. And twitter. And Charlie.

Speaking of whom, Markus is really the one that I clique with the most. Dude has a very laid-backness that is eerily similar to Jonathan. I don't wanna keep comparing him to Jon Jon because he's a completely different individual but yeah. So for whatever reason, Markus mistakenly used my old cover photo as his twitter background. It's funny because the right side is me during my graduation speech. It doesn't seem all that funny as I'm writing this but who gives a fuck. 

Really starting to clique up with him, David,and Alex. I'm cool with thaaat. 

Don't drag other people into your relationship problems. If your dude ask me some shit, I'ma tell him, skrait up! Watch what you do, who you do it with, and who's watching you do it.

And I hate overdramatic people who are always complaining. Bitch I will give you something to complain about, fuck outta here. 

Went to the Movies on The Lawn and saw Fast 6....nigga, that runway at the end was long as fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck. That's long it was. Also met someone really attractive. See, when I say attractive, that typically means there is something other than physical characteristics (usually) that attracts me to them. I've come to realize that I really enjoy power and status. If you pull up in a ghost, well damn, Trey tryna hit the passenger seat. I ain't sayin I'm a gold digger....but I ain't fuckin with no broke niggas. 

Been flirting and juggling, and I think I'll take Saturday to make a move and...we'll see what happens ;)

I should put up a sign that says "No Scrubs Allowed!!" Oh and no lame bitches either. 

See, these niggas forget how athletic and competitive I am. Even I do. Yeah I like dudes too but I'm nothing like a female, belee dat. I'll kiss a dude or whoop his ass. Don't play with the baaaaad bisexual. Totally dominated in dodgeball and my team didn't do  And also now that I'm thinking about it, let me talk to you directly for second. You were clearly interested in me but I was not interested in you in the LEAST bit. You're boring as fuck and I don't give two fucks if you choose to act like you don't see me. Makes it easier for meeeeee.

So I met this guy on grindr and made the supremely terrible mistake of telling him he was cute before I actually saw him in person....Now I see his ugly ass EVERYWHERE. He kinda acts like he's too good for me, which is fine cuz nigga I look better than you anywaaaaays.

Yoooo I seen Lil Duval tonight...he was funny as fuuuuuuuck! What that mouf do?

Ahhhhh! I can't wait to hit the club maaan. DON'T drop that thun, thun, thun. *starts twerking*
Let's see what happens tomorrow....

The Next Week...

I met this guy named Cole at the club. Well I left my podmates in line for Czar at Ybor. The thing about Ybor is that there are literally like 4 different gay clubs and all of the clubs are in short walking distance of each other. I met him at this one called Honeypot. He's a little shorter than I am (liek most guys) and he's Puerto Rican. He's very very lightskinned with blue eyes. Actually, his eyes were very piercing. I was almost afraid to look him in his eyes lol. I was initially upset because he was trying to get at another guy at the club, and I looked better than him. Whatever. He then took me and his "straight friend" to this place. I won't say what or where that place was but you can ask me personally and I'll probably tell you. Just know that you probably have never been to anything like it cuz I damn sure hadn't. Anyway, things happened. And the next day he took me to Chili's and remarked on how big my ass was lmao!! But he was so....I don't know. I really was into him. Long story short, He told me he was gonna come see me a few days later and I made a big deal out of it to my podmates and he never showed up. I felt so stupid and I'm sure I looked stupid to them too. Then I found out he was in a relationship. More Sidelinery for me. I'm tired of being the Joseline Hernandez.

I've also learned a few things about Alcohol, Weed, and other Intoxicating things: 1) Some people need that shit to have fun and I think that's lame as fuck. 2) You have to absolutely make sure that if you do decide to get fucked up, you need to make sure you are around people that you trust. Don't find yourself in a awkward position. 

Going to a Leadership Buffet tonight. Time to start my takeover. 

Peace, Love, and Soooooouuuuuuuuul

Titz Berserk

"Off to college

Yes, you went away

Straight from high school

You up and left me

We were close friends

Also lovers

Did everything

For one another

Now you're gone and I'm lost without you here now

But I know I gotta live and make it somehow"

Ahh!!! I've officially moved into Poplar Hall of The University of South Florida! Trey is up in this bitch!!!!

Where do we start? My roomate's name is Sam and he's pretty okay. Ever since we moved in, we both really have been doing our thing. He has a girl named Bonnie and she's cool, I met her once or twice. Most of my podmates (the people in the rooms around mine) are actually pretty okay. I can't really see us wanting to do some of the same things but it's whatever. They actually surprised me because some of them went out clubbing the other night (which I'm jealous of) but I'm guessing it was a cray cray night because there were police and medics walking out of someone's dorm the next morning. I know what happened but I won't disclose it. I've really been chilling with Maya, Chelsea, David, and Alex more so than anyone else. I wanna get to know Rachel and Kit Kat, they always seem to be having fun, and yall know I do some crazy ass shit.

My RA is freaking amazing. I love accents, especially island ones (she's from Barbados). She's very friendly but also very straight-forward. I kinda found myself having some trouble identifying with the people in this dormhall simply because...well, I'll say this: I've been told I live in the "suburbs" of the campus and the Northern section is the more urban area. It sounds strange but when you see the type of people that live in both areas, you can definitely see the difference. Now yall know I love everyone and can clique with anyone regardless of minute details such as race and sexuality, but what I'm saying is that I'm accustomed to hanging around mostly black or latino friends, and I guess I'm trying to put these people into the molds of Diane, Rafael, Jon Jon, Julisa, etc. Speaking of which, I saw this asian boy that reminded me so much of Justin. He was a little more masculine and had nike swag, which is probably why I found him more attractive than Chino. 

Btw, this post will be much more...tongue-held than usual simply because I have to measure its impact. I hope that makes sense. I do have to live with these people until like May sooo.

I'm just really glad to be around open-minded people like forreal. Tired of the ignorance that is Fort Myers. 

You guys know I typically don't be around straight guys like that the ones here are pretty cool. Or maybe they don't know that I'm bisexual? Or maybe they do and just don't care?

And now that I'm thinking about it, this boy named Addison (I think) told one of my friends here that he doesn't like me. BITCH I don't even know you! Fuck iz yu sayin?!

I need to make some rich Middle Eastern friends.

Soooo one of the best things I've experienced since getting here is the Hypnotist Show I went to earlier in the week. It was fucking cray cray. This man had people on stage thinking they were Michael Jackson. I kinda wanted to be up there but oh well. And last night I went to play Manhunt and there was the sexiest guy in the entire campus there. He looked like he might have been a darker blatino and his jaw structure was to-die-for.

Cameltoe.

Going to Ybor with poddies this weekend!!! Wooooo!

I keep going crazy over Big Sean's new song "Milf" but pretty much only over Nicki's verse (duh).

"So what you got for me, Sean?
I heard it's big and its long, 
I'll take my teeth out, suck it good
This where yo dick belong"

Anyway, I sit here and I question the feelings I have/had for Chino. A part of me thinks it was more of convenience seeing as I was always around him. You know how they say "Out of sight, Out of mind"? well yeah, since I haven't seen him and I KNOW I won't be seeing him anytime soon, I haven't really thought of him in that way...

Oh and before I close, Let me show you how to handle an irrelevant, style-lacking, insecure, no-life-having, hating-ass bitch. You couldn't beat me on my worse day, fuck outta here with that bitchassness. You couldn't get the attention of King Vladimir (who would've sent you to the guillotine), but I gladly decided to handle that ass. Love, Pinkie.

Go Away,Trey!

"Who should be hurt? Who should be ashamed? 
Am I supposed to change? Are you supposed to change? 
Who should be hurt? Will we remain? 
You need a resolution, I need a resolution, 
We need a resolution, We have so much confusion. "

As I write this, I feel...unsatisfied. That's the overall feeling I have from last night's party. Think of it like this: You're in an easter egg hunt but you can only find 3 or 4 eggs. You KNOW there's more out there, but you just can't anymore..
Really, this has been my summer. I've been looking for something, and I haven't found it. that might be due to the fact that I really don't know what the hell I'm searching for anyway.

Let me just start from the beginning. When arrived, the usual four were there, including...someone I'll call Thin Ink. I wasn't sure if was coming because of something that occurred in the last few days. Let me explain: Basically he tried to blast me on his status (childish) about a blog that has nothing to do with him, calling me tacky, attention-craving, and mentally unstable. Well I wouldn't say I crave attention but I GET attention, and I like the attention I get. And umm...listen playboy, you don't know just how mentally unstable I am ;) Don't test the kid. However, when I asked him about it, he tried to be very nonchalant and even insinuated that one of his friends felt the same way. They all denied but it still hasn't sit right with me since. I won't worry about it because I get money, make moves, and basically do what I please. Jealousy isn't cute.

"So why was Thin Ink even there?" you might ask. Well I don't know. It didn't matter to me BUT just for future reference. If I don't like you, everything you do and your very presence makes me uncomfortable and annoyed. Please Please Please do NOT make any subtle attempts to talk to me or to get me to talk to you. Don't stand next to me. DO NOT TOUCH ME which means don't put your hand on my side every time you walk by me. I'm so, I'm so, I'm so, I'm so, I'm so proud of Pinkie for controlling himself and remembering that the night was ours and not letting anyone ruin it.

I've recently realized that I really can't do people younger than me and sometimes my own age. All summer I've been surrounded by people older than myself, with the exception of Justin. I used to be attracted to goofiness, the same goofiness I found in Lucas and Justin. But its not what I want now...

So Chino came to my party with some of his friends and I felt that he pretty much forgot what he was even there for. He barely even spoke to me. I danced with him twice, and one time The Greek God joined in. It was...symbolic. There was the smoothness and sexiness I associate with age, and also the fun and electricity I associate with youth. Anyway, Chino left without saying anything at all. He later gave me some weird reason involving pepper spray and burning asses. But, idk. I guess I just really wanted to spend that night
with him.

I was very pissed off at the fact that someone stole Yuleidy-Bug's phone. Like who does that? And I feel dumb because they did it in plain sight. But I'm glad DYM came, they always hold a real nigga down. Brittani too. And Jose. Also glad that my nigga Ralph and Julisa went out to get drinks. I love them so much.

BREAKING NEWS:.....Boys.. If the kid back that thang up on ya, you better act like you know some. Move with it. Grab something. I've danced with studs that can dance better than some of you all. ...Girls...the kid can't fuck witcha if you don't know how to move that thaaaang. I'm done.

Random Sexy pic

I couldn't be with someone that I'm claiming and doesn't claim me. And flirts with everyone. Like everyone.

Overall, I just feel...unsatisfied. I didn't have any toys to play with :/ muahaha that sounds so...deviant. I am so..needing it right now. Something needs to happen in the next two days. My body is ready.

The worse thing about meeting new people is that I know I wont ever see them again. I met Abby last night, and she is maaaaad cool. I love lesbians, we all know this. She's very chill. And we had champagne in honor of me leaving. A nigga poppin bottles now. Levels. But anyway...so glad I met her and was able to finally meet and hang out with Linda.

Overall, I'm ready to leave. When I walked outside of Jojo's last night, I just stood there after I closed the door. I felt as if I had closed the door on a stage of my life. I feel as though everything I had ever done, the people I've met, all have been practice for what is to come. It won't be hard for me to make new friends and such. I feel missed already. People wishing me well, but no one has made me cry..yet. Yanela ALMOST did. But I know exactly who will.

The next post you see will be posted from my dorm room ;)

Reputation Degradation

"Broke bitches so crusty, disgust me.."

As I type this, I sit here in utter embarrassment. Tonight, I have been reminded why I don't typically associate with people younger than myself.

First, I wanna set the record straight. I don't post this for just for you to read. You know how their are different coping mechanisms for different people such as drinking, self-harming, etc.? Well this is how I cope with the craziness of my life while also having a written recount of things I may forget. The most important thing to remember is that this is REAL SHIT!! I live this shit! It's maaaad levels to this shit! I get really sensitive when people even mention my blog to other people besides me. There are many comical aspects such as the nicknames that I choose, but I don't mean for my blog to become something you read to get a good laugh. I want you to connect and empathize with the happenings and emotions portrayed in this blog. I want you to read and think "Damn, that's happening to me." or "I've been through that and it sucks". Moreover, if you happen to read something about yourself on this blog and you have a question, you should probably ask the person who wrote it (ME!). Please, I would gladly clarify anything written rather than have to find out that you think I hate you or worse, that you think I want to date you. Ehh!

And If you see something that speaks to you, COMMENT THAT SHIT! Message me. You never know. You could easily help me me understand something or even provoke thoughts for a later post.
(Had to get that out of my system)

Anyway, Tonight, my gut feeling told me to stay my ass at home. But I didn't listen. Next thing I know, I'm with my bestfriend, Brownboy, and dumb and dumber. I briefly mentioned brownboy a few posts ago. I only planned to hang out with Ralph and Brownboy and we were going to the beach, but the next thing I know, brownboy is telling these people that I'm coming to get them! I was confused because I thought we were going to chill at the boy's house but nope. The Greek God invited me to a getty, but used the word "party" it didn't matter to me, but I should've known better than to bring 16-year-olds who are non-Justin to a college party. Well, I didn't realize how old they were till we were pretty much there.
*goes to sleep and wakes up the next morning*
Maaaan. I don't feel like going over the minute details, but the next thing I know, I find myself getting aggravated by everybody except Rafael. We went to another party across the apartment complex and those three wanted to stay because...of things that were there. Ralph and I went back to chill with The Greek God,Bob the Builder and whoever else. They were mad cool. In fact, I've never been around friends of Josh's that I really didn't like. But, that might be my natural need to be around people older than myself. So as I'm chilling, three other people hit me up asking me what I'm up to and if I wanna chill. Ironic! Where was your ass like 4 hours ago? Ugh!

Bob the Builder is not someone I've ever been romantically interested in but I'm going to call him that because of things I'm about to say. So, Bob the Builder was a tad bit...gone lol. I've never seen him that talkative or amicable before. Don't get me wrong, he is really friendly and a dope ass nigga. He was talking to the three stooges when they came back from the other party. There was joke going about how he was trying to get at them like that but I don't think so. But Brownboy took it that way and then had some things to say in the car ride back about how uncomfortable he was. Could've fooled me but whatever.

Now you're wondering what I'm so upset about. Chill tf out let me get there!
I didn't like how Brownboy just included his friends in our plans without asking me if its okay first. I don't mind people that smoke, but if that's all your about then that's crazy. Dumb and Dumber were only 16 that's the crazy part. It was mad rude of the three stooges to just bust up in the place asking for liquor. They made me feel very uncomfortable and I also found myself feeling like a babysitter. MOST of all, it was my first time meeting many of those people, so now I feel like they have based their first impression of my off of people that I usually never even associate with. And Josh's texts after the fact made me feel like complete shit. I felt horrible. He probably won't even want to invite me to something that he isn't hosting anymore. Putting it into those terms makes me.....angry. I'm starting to feel like a dungeon dragon.

I'm the King and I officially declare that the three of us are done with this topic. MOVE ON OR BE GONE!

Listen. I swear if this Mr. PotatoHead lookin ass nigga say ONE MORE THING to me at work, I'm turning his ass into french fries.

It was really nice catching up with Diane the other day, makes me think that no matter how many days we go without contact, we still are there for each other. hmmph.

*waits for someone to ask me to go to the beach this week*

99 Problems

"Come 'ere bwoy! Bowcat, oh, true yuh rich?
Weh yuh wallet? Yeh, yuh 'ave it? Mmm, gi we it!"

I'm kinda asking for advice. Please comment or message me your thoughts...

As I type this, I feel a small emptiness inside of me. The last couple days I have really felt my relationships with different people start to fade away. Okay I'm really trying to to tear up, but its very hard for me to communicate to you, the reader, how I feel because I do not even understand. That's mainly because feelings are meant to be felt not understood.

I'm about to go to the University of South Florida. I'm intelligent and intellectual when need be. I'm not THAT ugly (I think).I'm a dope nigga, why stress over joke niggas? I guess just alot of things have been bugging me and so now I'm being an emotional you-know-what.

I feel Justin and I slowly pulling apart from each other. Its hard for me to sit here and imagine myself having any type of relationship with him much less any real feelings for him. That is probably because I haven't seen him in almost a week. Sometimes I think I need him in my life, other times I think the opposite. I always just wanted to know how he truly felt about me. That's all I wanted. I played myself into thinking there could ever be anything between us. At the end of the day, we're two fucked-up individuals.

*puts on chapstick*

So I really wanna hang out with some of the people I met at the Greek God's party BUT, my problem has always been oversexualization of self. I flirt with people without realizing it. I just have a very sultry personality. I don't wanna be like "Mark, do you wanna do lunch?" or "Kenny, you wanna beach it up?" and it come off as " Hey, do you wanna fuck?". Gay guys always take it like that from me. Always thinking da kid wanna get at them cakes, but it ain't always like that. And also , I don't wanna be too...pushy? They have a clique already established and I don't wanna..I don't really know how to explain it. I remember how it was when I had my clique in high school (Team Amazing). I never bothered to hang out with anyone else and often gave people that I could have been GREAT friends with the cold shoulder and didn't realize it til it was too late.I grew out of that but now I find myself often conflicted when trying to choose which offer to take, who to do what with and on what day.

Believe me sweety, I got enough to feed the needy ;)

BANG BANG!! I'm in a good mood now hahahaha. I think I'm gonna kill the muthafuckin DJ.


PLENTY O' THINGS I would like to say on this blog but I won't, at least not yet. A good king knows when its best to keep the harmony in the kingdom, and when its best to let all hell break loose ;)

Haven't talked to Spongebob since that night....what a fucking weirdo.

This girl at my job annoys the shit out of me. Dammit man. Her voice is like somebody biting my ear off. Think Mike Tyson. Van Gogh. No, definitely Mike Tyson....anyway. This bitch asked if a Quarter Pounder was a Big Mac...you been working there two weeks already. Dumb broad I swear.

OMG I'm SOOOOOO excited for my party!! I'm gonna turn the fuck uppp!!!! There better be plenty of genetalia for me to grind up on...that sounded so wrong haha.

There's something about you I really like....but I don't time for that..literally..13 DAYS AND I'M OUT THIS BEOOOTCH!!

I wanna go to the movies tomorrow. And I really want to go on a date before I leave :/

Thank You For Coming, Trey..

Leaving in 16 days.

How I feel about last night

Last night. Last night. Last night. Hol'up. Let me get to that.

I've come to realize that my life is based largely on coincidence. The right things just seem to happen to me because I'm in the right place in the right time. For example, I won freshmen-class president by 4 votes, and that was largely because I happened to have a bag full of candy on me during lunch (voting time) from a fundraiser. I got my job because one of my mom's offenders happened to work at my job before I did, and Omar (owner) told her he's always looking for good people to hire. This entire summer has been one giant coincidence after another. I've developed plenty of relationships this summer (platonic and otherwise) purely because I was in the right place in the right time.

Let me be a little more direct. Near the beginning of the summer, Chino really hurt me by kissing my ex. In turn, I coincidentally saw his ex-boo/Guy-he-was-somewhat-obsessed-with at the club and we danced, starting a whirlwhind of emotions down the road. As I confessed my feelings for Chino, he didn't take me seriously, and though he has dude and he's "happy", I still can't shake the feeling of something not being right. So how ironic is it that the guy he spent 3/4 of the summer chasing, confessed his feelings for me last night?

Let me back up. So the Greek God invited me to his house rave last night. I went, of course. I'm royalty, so I can't ignore the summons of a mythological entity. I arrived and brought some sodas and chips because...well, I don't drink. Da kid was lookin mad fresh in my little neon ensemble. I walked in said hey, but I walked back out lol, I was soo nervous. Josh and this attractive skinny nigga named Kenny ( with sexy tats) left somewhere (not my type tho). I won't say where or what for, because..well yeah hahaha. Anyway, I went back in and I recognized the Pretty-Fly-For-A-White-Guy that I saw at Zeeleekah. I took him and some lesbians to TBL because it was his birthday and he wanted to dance. I spent about 15 min with him, and in those minutes, I didn't sense the same aspect of masculinity that attracted me at the club that one night. Anyway, It was my first time meeting a few of them and they were dope as hell. Marky Mark and his sister Michelle were bomb af. I love the energy and vibes they give off. There was another kid named Victor who seemed really into Josh...that's the only person he really danced with. I sense something weird about him, Something very familiar as if I've met him in times long past when I wasn't such a real ass nigga. Kenny seemed cool but there is an air of mystery about him.I feel something kinda thuggish about him, I like it. Hopefully I can get to know him better (not like that). You guys know how I feel about long hair.

BTW, I call **** the Greek God because of his aura. In mythology, Gods tend to be so powerful adn commanding that you could not lay your eyes on them in their true forms, hence why they typically take human forms.One can just feel their presence. That is how I felt about him when I first got to know him, and even when I first came in contact with him that fateful night in February. But after last night, I see him..as normal. I don't feel so nervous being around him,although his smile is killer.

As for the party itself, live af. Dude my shirt came off. My shirt never comes off due to my extreme self-consciousness. I danced. I was really feeling myself. And I was feeling everyone else too ;) I'll just say, I left with dry lips and somewhat of a cotton mouth. I've never been turned on by dancing with someone, yet I was last night. I won't say who, but aye, that person probably knows. I sensed that there were some underlying issues simmering in the room but I ignored it because I was just trying to have fun..*starts twerking*

Okay to the juicy part. Before the party got started, I stood in the kitchen and I felt a figure come up behind me. To my surprise, its Spongebob. (I've mentioned him in many of my recent blogs, but I've used his real name) It was awkward at first but we start talking about thing sthat have happened recently. He admitted having feelings for me and later on told me how he wanted to be with me, though I didn't take him seriously because he wasn't himself. Could I imagine myself with him? Yes. Is it realistic? Nope. Right guy, wrong timing. I don't think Justin realizes how close Spongebob and I are. In his mind, he is the ultimate enemy. But me? I think SB is misunderstood. He is looking for the validation that comes from being loved truly. I believe that he means no intentional harm. I actually think he's a sweetheart and he told me a few things that make me see him differently, things I refuse to put on this blog.

I'll end my post with this. Last night was a huge confidence boost. I'm a good catch, a GREAT catch. I'm smart (so I've been told), headstrong, compassionate, and according to Greek God, "cute and I know it".Life is too short. Life your muthafuckin life. Be a bad bitch and live your life!!!

Go, Go Power Rangers!

He said he came from Jamaica, he own a couple acres
Couple fake visas cuz he never got his papers
Gave up on love fuckin wit dem heartbreakers
But he was gettin money with the movers and the shakers
-Nicki Minaj

He said he came from Vietnam, He got it goin on
Couple contacts so he could see what's goin on
Gave up on love fuckin wit em all wrong
But he was gettin money like the kids in hong kong
-Trey Cee

Firstly, one thing I find super annoying about the USF Class of 2017 page, are the 200 upperclassmen that are on there just to pick UP freshmen or pick ON freshmen. Bitch we ain't stoopid. Like Wut dafuq iz you sayin?

I've always said that I have 19 AE's but today that changes. I realize that some were really aspects of my personality that don't need to be named, so today I clear it up. Also, some of them are dead..meaning they are phases of my life that I am completely past and always will be. 

The original list: Charlie,Rico,Pinkie,Felix the Cat,Baby Trey,Ross Austin,Smart Guy,Brooklyn,Wonder boy,Joseline,Acks,Ray Croc,Father Goodness,The Forever Dreamer,Angelo,Mr.Mental,Vladimir ,Israel,X
The New List: Charlie, Vladimir, Pinkie

Charlie: aka Charlemagne Zolanski. The fun-loving, twerking, super-friendly-but-will-also-check-you-in-a-heartbeat Russian Prince. 
When you think Charlie, think Starships by Nicki Minaj but also Roman's Revenge. 

Vladmir: The oldest of the two. King of Moscow and is a sarcastic dick. Very ambitious though and willing to go through anyone to get what he wants.  He will destroy your entire freaking life. Non-emotional. Uncaring. Charlie's older brother. Think, Monster by Kanye West, Jay-Z and Nicki Minaj 

Pinkie: The super-sexual trinidadian hood rat. Dutty bwoi. Imagine "Friday"and "Boyz n da Hood" mixed with...well, porn. Occasional flirtmonster. Think of any song by Trina. 

Forever Dreamer: That's me. Usually the main voice behind these posts. I am the vision and the hope of things to come. I am the deep of the mind. 

I always go from one to the other. They all stem from different aspects of my life and events which I would rather not go into detail about. But just know that this should help explain how the graduation keynote speaker can also be on some ratchet shit. Yall don't feel us. *changes channel*

Yesterday I took Cristina, Justin, and Julisa took the beach for a "Twerknic" lol! We was chompin on dat chicken from Publix and shakin dem cheeks on the beach. Wit da white foolks.

Usually, there's always three main people in my life:
1) The person I REALLY want, but is taken and/or doesn't want me
2) The person I kind of want, and I know wants me (I often take them for granted)
3) The person I DON'T want, but REALLY wants me.

I'm not leaving. I won't leave. I won't leave until I know exactly how you feel. Because no matter you're with or I'm with, you'll always be dwelling somewhere in this wasteland I call my mind. Maybe I'm right in what your soul is trying to relay to me. Some of your actions tell me what your soul desires. But your words are those cold bullets of your mind, shooting down any illogical thought such as the thought of you and I.

I just called this nigga at damn near 3am...and he answered, sounding grouchy and sleepy as hell. But he answered, that's how important I am to him. But I don't think he realizes how important I he is to me. As we rode, "Differences" by Ginuwine came on. Noticed a slick look he gave me. First time I ever really listened to the words of the song..and it was in that moment I realized something. That one night, he told me that I really influenced him...and that my temporary leave of absence really affected him. But I ride for that nigga. And honestly, I don't remember what its like without having him around. Listening to him bitch about his hair. Noticing him purse the corner of his lips when something doesn't please him. That look he gives you when  he wants something. haha...whoa

"I wish that I could take a journey through your mind
And find emotions that you always try to hide 
I do believe that there's a love you wanna share"

I was so excited when the Greek God invited me to go to the movies with him lol. :) Too bad I didn't see it till it was too late :(

So...Comcast. Honestly, I don't know wtf is wrong with him. He and AJ had things to say about each other, but you're at the pool together? Oh you posting statuses bout some other dude? I don't even know who he was but all I know is I guess Comcast said they were just friends but he and the dude was in a bathroom stall together?? I don't know and I really don't care. I'm being somewhat hypocritical  in the sense of my expectations of him and my feelings for Chino, BUT I never claimed him like he claimed me. Therein lies the difference. I don't like how he just blocked Chino without even knowing him and gave me some BS excuse...nobody does that. Overall, I can't trust him and on some real shit, you can't associate with the kid if you ain't a real nigga. Simple.

I'm soooo not used to working 6 days in a row. OMG I'm so tired...my body is tired..my everything else is tired too. I don't feel like doing anything but staying up til 5 after waking up at midnight and working on this blog....sigh.

I have cracked the code that is Terence Brown.

Leave comments. *Walks into ocean*