I came here looking for you..

"You came here looking for someone else.
I'm sorry I don't have any of that person to give to you.
I'm not hurt. I'm not angry.
I’m sharp and alive. 
My tongue is wicked and my thoughts are wild and free. 
I’m something no man can handle. You don’t even recognize me anymore. 
My kingdom is impervious. I’ve locked you out of my heaven. The memory of you, lives on earth."


I came here looking for you
But I found just wasn't true
I know you're hurt. I know you're angry
He was dull and lives no longer.
I'l slay your tongue and tame your thoughts.
I'm no mere man and a mortal man you need not. Your disposition has shifted.
My love is impenetrable.You'll forever be the prince of this castle. I'll find you amongst the stars.

World Peace and Bloody Faces

"It's alright.

I know they think I get around

You and I got something they can't know about

Really only heaven knows my heart"

In my nightmares, there's a scene on a beach. On that beach lies a gold coffin sitting amongst black sand. The water is crystal clear and waves are crashing on the black beach. However, they dare not bring the dark earth matter back into the depths of the water. Off in the distance, over the ocean, there is a fog. A purple fog. The casket opens and there I lay covered in...rags. I'm decked out with tattered clothing. However, on my head rests the most intricate crown ever seen. It is made from gold, but covered in diamonds.

This is some funeral. No one else is present. There are only footprints in the sand.

Some people are addicted to drugs. I'm addicted to admiration and affection. Spare me the "L" word. I don't believe these people really ever meant it. I get a rush from compliments and wandering gazes.

I'm an empath. I can feel what others feel. I hate it.

Tonight I considered just driving. I was going to get on to I-75, and just drive until I couldn't drive anymore.

I recently became romantically involved with someone I used to be very attracted to in high school . He didn't want me then but now he does apparently. I could quote some words from a very popular Mike Jones song, but I'll keep that easter egg to myself. Well, he initially said he didn't want strings which is cool with me, but a few days later he took me around his friends and after a very crazy night, he used the "b" word.....Boyfriend. Uhhh. *scratches head* Baby, that title has alot of strings attached.

I feel a new alter ego coming on.

I need some change. I could never change who am, however, I can change my approach. Seems like I'm always going out of my way for other people but rarely get the same in return. For example, If we're friends, you know you always get a text from me every major holiday. On Christmas I sent 80 texts messages out and got maybe half of that back. New years' will be different, I won't be texting anyone first.

I know it probably sounds petty to many of my readers but I relate small things like that to bigger things like this: Earlier this year I stuck my neck out for one of my podmates. Her boyfriend didn't give a fuck about her at a party and I made sure she was okay. Well basically he told me he didn't like Black people (and almost fucked all the way up in the process) and she took his side and told me to stay out of it.

2014 will be a spiritual journey for me more than anything else. I'll be connecting to greater forces and gaining a new understanding of the people and the environment around me. I really don't know who I am. I don't know what I'm sexually attracted to anymore. I don't know what I wanna be "when I grow up". I don't really know what all the name "Trey" encompasses. I plan on eliminating the negativity and stress from my life, and creating a greater spiritual entity within my entire being.


I'll die loved or I'll be damned. 

Sober in Hate

"He's all alone, some things will never change 

The lonely loner seems to free his mind at night "

Originally, this blog was in response to situation I faced before I left USF for break in which someone went into my room and took my personal belongings without my permission. You can imagine what that was like. Everyone felt awkward the next day, but I don't really give a fuck. Please don't ever leap up in my face  and try to put on some big and bad make-believe costume on because babygirl Trey is the motherfuckin big bad wolf and I will surely huff and puff and blow your house down. Anyway, I've been working on this because I didn't wanna dedicate my blog to one issue that I no longer care about. But the last thing I'll say is that I made sure to make a big deal out of it as an example to everyone else.

Loyalty is Royalty, and you bitch? You belong with the peasants.

Sometimes people characterize me as mean and heartless, and I feel that's true but only when I 'm given incentive to be that way. Other than that, I consider myself more nice than I absolutely have to be. For example, two weeks ago, The pod ordered pizza. I put in the order ( first I asked if anyone wanted to join in because I was ordering for myself.).I was nice enough to pay the tax and the delivery fee. But guess what? Someone took advantage of that and didn't put in ANYTHING for what they had individually ordered. I was collecting the money on the table and honestly have no clue who DIDN'T coontribute due to my own lack of paying attention (not that I thought I actually had to). So basically I paid $10 more than I had to, and that's all the way fucked up. However, $10 to me, isn't something to argue about, and so I never said anything. I don't always like confrontation and plus USF already thinks I'm more ratchet than I actually am and paints me as some violent egomaniac. Now if I knew who it was, that'd be different. But I've learned my lesson, and won't be volunteering to do that ever again lol.

I spent my last few days with Mollie. I absolutely love her. She is probably the most genuine person in pod. She got me when I need her and I most deff got her. I love that little pothead.

In other news, Ja'Markus and I had a good ass conversation and cleared everything up. While he will never be someone that I really rely on or trust to a great extent, we always have alot of fun when hangs out with us and we all turn up. Kinda sad that he's leaving but hey, life goes on.

He mentioned something about the Pod being mad floppy. I agree. They are too fake sometimes. But as long as it isn't directed toward me. I'm good. I learned from the whole Curtis thing ( One of my podmate's boyfriend was making everyone uncomfortable, I told her, no one else admitted the truth until they had no choice). I'm TOO real about mine.

As you all know by now, I usually talk to multiple people at one time however there is always one person that's my "main". Well, his name is Sammii and I'm sooooo confused. One moment he seems interested in me, and the next, he just doesn't. For example, I keeps saying, I wanna meet you so bad and shit, but keeps coming up with excuses. (He lives back in Tampa btw). I know he's busy but...I'm important too lol. And course, he reminds me of ...someone else I used to talk to. Much like that person, Sam is very much a pothead and smokes multiple times a day, everyday. I don't really care about smoking, however, I feel like when you smoke, you're not in your normal state of mind. And if you are always smoking, then you are never in your right state of mind which means I don't really know how you truly feel about me. But guys...he is so fine lol. However, I won't compromise myself for some petty attraction.

There's also the other guys who I'm sure I've mentioned before. I don't recall the nickname I gave him right now, so I'll just be calling him Grande. We've had our fun before lol but I always wanted something more serious with him. Well, we've been flirting all week via Twitter then today I find out he has a boyfriend...umm what? So yall KNOW I had to go check this kid out right? Now, I'm not trying to be conceited, but I look way better than this kid. I can't understand why Grande would be with him over me. (Not that want a relationship with him anymore). I would tell you what his boyfriend looks like, but there's no way for me to do it without being "mean" so I'll keep my plump lips closed.

The Greek God is literally all that I want to be when I'm his age. Well-traveled, intelligent, doing well for himself...he is just DREAMY.

I don't need alcohol to have a good ass time. Sadly, can't say the same for others.

Still feel like I haven't made a true BEST friend at USF. Yet.

I lost 20 pounds in college and I'm reaaaally not trying to gain in back in three weeks. My mom is on her way with a box of fried chicken as we speak. Le sigh,

Sitting here thinking about Diane. She has reached the highest level of best-friendom. I feel like friendship is a constant thing where one person goes out of their way to do things for the other, and vice verse. You do those to prove how much someone means to you and for them to realize that. (OMG my ear is so itchy right now). However, right now I feel that no matter what we will always be friends. She's the only person that I don't stress about concerning our friendship. I trust her and she trusts me. I can't say that for most people.

My mom is SO surprised and pissed that my dad did not speak to me last night at my sister's event. I'm not.

Alex is still killing me with his whiteness, from 250 miles away -___-

Class dismissed.

Adventures in Caucasia

"Bitches lyin' on the kid, I won't leave for that

Intimidated by my aura (ora) where Rita at?"

These last two weeks have been super stressful and I'm really looking forward to Thanksgiving Break. Over the last two weeks some of my fellow E-board members have tried to oust me, I have lost the OTL Position, went to Ybor three times in a row and didn't truly have a really good time, questioned my major/future, and of course my usual unstable love life. Here goes nothing.

The biggest issue I need to vent about right now is this whole OTL thing. I didn't get it and I was told that is because it's a leadership-development position and if you're already a leader, well that makes no sense lol. I take it as a compliment and I honestly believe that's true considering the people who got it. Deeks was so right. I'm looking into joining street team for SG or New Student Connections. I really wanna be a PAL more than anything else. More than anything else, I'm upset that my time was completely wasted. I no longer have the opportunity to travel abroad this summer (which was my plan B) so what now?

I know who I am and what I've done. I feel myself constantly having to prove myself to these sorry ass people at this school. Speaking of which, two people that I work with in Hall Council have some type of personal vendetta against me and one even held a meeting in which he basically got two other dummies to try to bully me. Not happening. The kid does what the fuuuuuuuuck he wants and he ain't leaving until he ready. When I showed him how confrontational I can really be, he backed off  but naaaah it's too late son. You woke the dungeon dragon up and now this Locomotive will run your ass over!

Antywayz, I'm thinking about leaving hall council because it's too much stress over something I never truly wanted to do in the first place. It's all about personal growth, and I'm receiving nothing but a headache. We had our Harry Poplar event yesterday, which was full of nerds as Vladimir predicted. They were all trying to act so friendly. Ha. Nothing worse than a fake ass bitch. Antywayz, just remember that we are colleagues, not friends. I will make sure you know that.

Trey in Ybor: November 14th-16th

Thursday- 5 people flaked out on me at the last minute. Went to Social by myself. Met up, danced with, and made out with a guy that I honestly was not even that interested in. (I really want his friend). The kid got maaaad compliments all night though.

Friday- Went with the Power Rangers and some other poddies to Czar and Honeypot (by myself). I hate going with large groups because I feel myself wanting to be with everyone yet everyone always splits up. Czar was fucking boring and I didn't wanna club alone (again).

Thursday- Went to Gbar w/ Hiram, Charmaine, and Phil. Hiram is so fun to be around and just a really positive person. However, I think I'm too...(bad?) for him. I feel like I can't be who I truly am because he'll judge me and I don't wanna disappoint him. And he's cute lol. Oh and I saw my major crush there, and he was making out with some other guy. #StoryOfMyLife. I'm pretty sure I died.

I miss Team Amazing :(

I'm thinking about changing my major from ISS to Mass Comm. Idk, I can totally see myself as a Mass Comm major more than anything else.

Best moment of the week: Markus and Big Titty >>>

So, the 30something people I live with in this section of floor are referred to Poddies or Podmates. The dynamic is interesting to say the least haha. There are really four different factions: The Power Rangers, The Size Queens, The Greeks, and....the Extras hahahaha. I'm friends with everyone (mostly) however I typically only hang with the first two. I've always been that way, trying to befriend everyone, which usually leaves me stuck in the middle. I only really feel like I have a true connection with maybe 2 or 3 people as far as trust, loyalty and true friendship goes.

DownLow boys are the worst!!! Stay paranoid as if people really care about who you sleep with. I've learned my lesson.

I am not a human being.
Oh and to someone special....I hope you're reading this.

Umm the conversation is over, you can leave now.

Press The Blue Button

"I can't tell you what I learned from school,

But (nah) I could tell you a story or two, um

Yeah of course I learned some rules

Like dont pass out with your shoes on (get the sharpie!)"

Umm why is Wiz Khalifa coming for homecoming? He ain't poppin...

Oh, I apologize in advance for all of the gifs. There's alot of emotion I need to to express in this blog. 

Ever since I've gotten to college, I be feelin ratch as fuck. My podmates can't believe that people at home always say I act white lol. I literally have almost fought 3 guys so far. My life. 

Trey's Love Life in 30 seconds:

Guy A took me on a date to a Boba house. He sung to me. Not interested. 

Guy B went with me to a club. Reminds me of ex (LS). Only wants dick. Slight interest.

Guy C talked me at a club. Sexy as fuck. Into me. But too busy. Never has time for me. Mega interest.

Guy D always answers my texts and calls. Works everyday. Still haven't met. Slight interest.

Guy E constantly busy. Bailed on a date. A bit unreliable. Cute. Maybe too fem. Dwindling interest.

Girl F (confidential) shhh ;) Definite interest.

The other night >><<. If you got a call or text, you know. Thank you Summer for taking care of me.

Died my hair dark red ;)

Power struggle in hall council. Keep it diplomatic or you will truly regret it. Basically, you can't check me if I'm bout mine and know what I'm doing (and you don't)/ Why these salty, why they sodium? Is it because my flow slicker than petroleum? I'm starting to feel like a dungeon dragon! You should've knocked ;)

So, as I'm typing this, I'm sitting at the table with 5 of my podmates and my Resident Assistant (whom I love so dearly). It's fucking 6 in the morning!! I'm tired as fuck!! Let me enlighten you.

For privacy reasons, I'm going to call this person "Cleveland". So Cleveland invited me to hang out with her and some of my other podmates and some guys that she would be meeting for the first time. When we initially went outside, I was a little but more concerned with Bluejay (one of my various crushes around campus). So her friend's name was Arik and he was accompanied by a skinny black boy named Robert and a white guy named Gareth. I was SO surprised when I saw Arik, because in all honesty, he was sexy as fuck. Totally my type with the exception of him being a little too short. He had milk-and-honey skin with long, neat dreads that rested on his impeccable pecs.

See, the thing about Aquarians is that when you first meet us, we seem unapproachable and abrasive. However, we tend to be very caring (not that we'll let you know that). I also don't really like to have much interaction with sexy straight guys because I don't want them to get the wrong idea from me being subconsciously flirtatious. So I was very quiet throughout most of the interaction between us and the guys. Eventually we ended up on the rooftop of the parking garage, and this is where it really started all happening. Now ya'll KNOW I'm excellent at understanding someone's motives and thoughts based on both their verbal language and their body language. This is what throwing up all sorts of red flags. I noticed that he kept trying to get Cleveland alone and trying to get us all to go back up into the pod, more importantly he was trying to get her drunk. Another of my podmates also let us know that he had an abusive past with his girlfriends, which instantly sent up a red flag. He also made little sexual comments and let's be honest: This nigga live and hour away...WHO THE FUCK IS GOING TO DRIVE FOR AN HOUR JUST TO "CHILL" AT MIDNIGHT?? "Not I" said the fly.

Let me wrap this up so that you feel compelled to read the rest of my blog. Hookah ended up coming with us, and I'm glad because he was able to take most of the brunt as I supported. I mean, I feel like I'm always about to get into a fight because I'm helping someone else out, and it was nice to NOT have to do that. We took two cars to Taco Bell after spending 15 minutes with Cleveland pleading with her to not stay with a guy she had just met an hour ago. We basically tried to ditch them at Taco Bell, and Cleveland actually tried to get out of the car...WHILE IT WAS MOVING.

 I was wrestling her in the back seat. She was trying to argue with all 6 of us about the guy. We kept telling her that he wasn't any good and he was sketchy as fuck. Her problem is that she is way too trusting. You see, after the situation at the Toga Party, I REFUSE to allow one person to be left behind with someone they don't know. So as we all returned , her unwelcomed guests started to become aggressive, mostly towards Hookah. Honestly, he a real ass nigga. He earned SO much respect from me.

 He really went out of his way to help Cleveland. So basically the guests got really aggressive and Arik even tried to pin the blame on me. One of them jumped up as if he was going to start scrappin, I was ready for anything and everything! Hookah ended up pressing the blue rape button and Robert (one of the guests) started getting upset and like snappppped! He was the coolest one but then he transformed bihh! I took notice that he yelled "Dude this always happens to us!!". My nigga, why are you always getting the police called on you? Re-evaluate your life, playboy.

They started walking towards their car with Cleveland, and Ecstasy agreed to go watch her. The cop came about 8 minutes later and talked to Hookah then proceeded to go talk to the others. It was a waste of time because the cop ultimately could not do anything about the situation. So, Rachel, Alanna, Hookah, Stormtrooper and I all went to Taco Bell drive thru. I have to admit, the drive-thru order taker was very friendly and she was a lil babieee! lol . So we ate in the parking lot and tuuuuurned up!!! The kid was jammin!!! It was a life-break, in that moment, I forgot about..well, life.

When we got back, that all came to a crashing halt when I walked in to the pod to see these three niggas sitting up watching TV. Biggest WTF moment of my life.

It's my turn to do something. I let Hookah attempt to end it. I let Ecstasy try to end it. It's Charlie's turn. SO, I basically called Barbados and let her know what's up. She came out and I did as well to find that Arik and Cleveland were gone. First, Robert said that Arik went the bathroom and Cleveland went to her room. Gareth said they left together and Barbados could clearly see that they were generally very cheeky.Finally those three left, and now I'm sitting at a table. We're all discussing what's going on. Hookah is being very logical (I'm impressed). Cleveland is listening but I see the words going in one ear and out the other. Stormtrooper just mentioned how the main problem is that she trusted complete strangers over us (Jackpot!). Ecstasy is being very middle-of-the-fence. (Your own side? I respect that!) Rachel just SO passive aggressively got up to go to her room. Joycelyn speaks for about 10 min...okay we're done. Everything seemed like it didn't matter to Cleveland. Whatever.

Overall, the problem is that she trusted a total stranger over 7 people who KNOW her. Who knows what our bitching stopped tonight. You never know. But, I'm so over it, really. You gotta be careful with people nowadays, and that's a lesson you'll have to learn for yourself...

Oh you don't see me? You'll don't hear me? You gon feeeeel me hoe!! It's me HOE!!! It's Trey, hoe!!!

Bert, Is That You?

"All those minds games never mind cause they all lose (bad no)

In the physical sense I mean that

I ain't tryna kiss up, suck up, feed gas

I ain't like them niggas you sucking your teeth at, nope"

Just sitting here looking at my surroundings. I'm feeling a mixture of emotions right now.


I try to be very friendly and humorous, but at the same time very firm and upfront. I'm very open, which tends to make others feel open to me.

You know what? There's alot of fakeness that occurs in this pod. I don't say anything, because if you wanna be fake, then that's YOUR decision, just know that I won't be associated with that bullshit. Its so unusual for me, because I've never been around people so afraid to voice their opinions and be generally upfront.


Now I definitely am one for picking battles. When Markus pulled his little creep shit, I was mad af. I said nothing, knowing who I am and what I'm capable of. But I really mean is this: I didn't go on acting like everything was all dandy. He did it once, I got over it. He did it again, stopped fucking with his ass. So I don't consider him a friend. I don't do anything nor say anything that would give ANYONE the idea that I am still cool with him.

But that can't be said for others in the pod. I just watch and observe. I take note. I question whether I am being talked about as I leave the room...

I just want like 2 or 3 people in the pod that  I consider my BEST friends. I don't really have a best friend here yet besides Shaitown on the otherside of the freakin campus -___-. Its hard for me to really talk seriously with the guys but at the same time, I don't know if I reaaaally trust the girls yet.
I'm gonna try to talk to Sam more. I know him, but I feel like I don't know him. Really, he's very hard to read. Us being close is inevitable, but I just haven't even hung out with him outside the pod. That sucks.

Too many creep ass people in this pod. I almost think that some of them are afraid to be up front with me. I'm not trying to garner fear, only respect.

Franky came and chilled today lol...He's sooooo not my type. He actually kinda reminded me of Rafael. Shit was cray. But he was very lanky. It was kinda awkward.

I get really hungry when I'm upset. I just noticed that.

Legit can't wait for Rafael to get here. There is no one on this campus like that nigga. He dope af.

I wish that Joycelyn wasn't the RA. We would be such great friends, she understands things that other people in the pod do not understand. I wanna know what she's really like. She smokescreens alot of her life from us.

Was offered shrooms tonight. I like my brain cells, thanks.

Anyway, I've been getting really close to Katie. Omg I freakin love her. She's just always down for whatever, much like myself. And she has  great jaw structure lmao. But I enjoy being invited to do things and go places because I'm not used to that. I used to always make the plans then get upset when people didn't follow through, after agreeing. It's nice to feel like someone actually enjoys my presence. That sounded more serious than I meant it to.

Blah. I need a good time. I need a fresh breath of air.


Some of this week's interesting tweets:

"Its not that I don't like you, I just don't fuck with you. Refuse to associate myself with you. #OhWell"
"Survivor: Pod 3500. I'm trying to vote these bitches off the island..."
"When you start a war, it's important to make sure the majority of of the countries are on your side... ;)"
"When people insert themselves in the conversation..Ima need you to backspace out.."

A Bad Role Model.

"If anybody knew that it was you and your house,

That I was creepin' to all the time,

I'd probably still do it,

'Cause I find it hard to keep you off of my mind."

Just wanna say that this has been written in the time span of two weeks. It was originally titled "What That Mouf Do?" but I realized I never posted link for my readers to read, and since then many things have happened. So this is a revamped version, I've added enough for two separate posts. Hope you understand and enjoy. 

Today marks my first full week living on campus and it's been.....interesting to say the least lol. 

K so today I went to get something out of my fridge and I look up and out the window and almost choke (pause). At first I thought it was a real person staring at me but it actually was a Jonah Hill cut out lmfao. I literally was like "What the hell?!" and of course my need to share news as such forced me to run out of my room and grab Alex and show him. Which reminds me, I should probably put up some decorations or something in my room lol. It looks so bare and its definitely not worthy of a Russian Prince like me. *giggles*

I've been getting to know my podmates more and more as the days go on and I think we are an interesting yet somewhat-volatile mix of people. I'm not Miss Cleo or Raven, but I can deff forsee some serious shit going down in the not-too-distant future. We are all mad chill and cool when we're ALL together, BUT everyone can see the division(s) happening, mainly between the guys and the girls. I myself find some people much more tolerable when certain other people are around or are not around. I hope that made sense lmao.

There's this one girl that no one really likes in here...I honestly don't know why. She seems tolerable and actually very generous. Still digging. 

I digress. One thing I hope everyone in this pod learns is that we all LIVE together. That means we will pretty much all always know each others business, well except the people who like never hang out in the pod with everyone else. Sometimes I laugh to myself because they'll try to act like something's a secret while everyone pretty much knows the gist of it.

See this Cold War really was kicked into gear when the guys told Kit Kat about our impressions of her. Really, I don't think she's a slut at all. Even if, it really isn't my concern. She got a little freaky side to her though, I find that interesting. She's mad fun to be around. 

I'm still on keeps-comments-to-self mode. Just observing and commenting to myself. And Markus. And twitter. And Charlie.

Speaking of whom, Markus is really the one that I clique with the most. Dude has a very laid-backness that is eerily similar to Jonathan. I don't wanna keep comparing him to Jon Jon because he's a completely different individual but yeah. So for whatever reason, Markus mistakenly used my old cover photo as his twitter background. It's funny because the right side is me during my graduation speech. It doesn't seem all that funny as I'm writing this but who gives a fuck. 

Really starting to clique up with him, David,and Alex. I'm cool with thaaat. 

Don't drag other people into your relationship problems. If your dude ask me some shit, I'ma tell him, skrait up! Watch what you do, who you do it with, and who's watching you do it.

And I hate overdramatic people who are always complaining. Bitch I will give you something to complain about, fuck outta here. 

Went to the Movies on The Lawn and saw Fast 6....nigga, that runway at the end was long as fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck. That's long it was. Also met someone really attractive. See, when I say attractive, that typically means there is something other than physical characteristics (usually) that attracts me to them. I've come to realize that I really enjoy power and status. If you pull up in a ghost, well damn, Trey tryna hit the passenger seat. I ain't sayin I'm a gold digger....but I ain't fuckin with no broke niggas. 

Been flirting and juggling, and I think I'll take Saturday to make a move and...we'll see what happens ;)

I should put up a sign that says "No Scrubs Allowed!!" Oh and no lame bitches either. 

See, these niggas forget how athletic and competitive I am. Even I do. Yeah I like dudes too but I'm nothing like a female, belee dat. I'll kiss a dude or whoop his ass. Don't play with the baaaaad bisexual. Totally dominated in dodgeball and my team didn't do  And also now that I'm thinking about it, let me talk to you directly for second. You were clearly interested in me but I was not interested in you in the LEAST bit. You're boring as fuck and I don't give two fucks if you choose to act like you don't see me. Makes it easier for meeeeee.

So I met this guy on grindr and made the supremely terrible mistake of telling him he was cute before I actually saw him in person....Now I see his ugly ass EVERYWHERE. He kinda acts like he's too good for me, which is fine cuz nigga I look better than you anywaaaaays.

Yoooo I seen Lil Duval tonight...he was funny as fuuuuuuuck! What that mouf do?

Ahhhhh! I can't wait to hit the club maaan. DON'T drop that thun, thun, thun. *starts twerking*
Let's see what happens tomorrow....

The Next Week...

I met this guy named Cole at the club. Well I left my podmates in line for Czar at Ybor. The thing about Ybor is that there are literally like 4 different gay clubs and all of the clubs are in short walking distance of each other. I met him at this one called Honeypot. He's a little shorter than I am (liek most guys) and he's Puerto Rican. He's very very lightskinned with blue eyes. Actually, his eyes were very piercing. I was almost afraid to look him in his eyes lol. I was initially upset because he was trying to get at another guy at the club, and I looked better than him. Whatever. He then took me and his "straight friend" to this place. I won't say what or where that place was but you can ask me personally and I'll probably tell you. Just know that you probably have never been to anything like it cuz I damn sure hadn't. Anyway, things happened. And the next day he took me to Chili's and remarked on how big my ass was lmao!! But he was so....I don't know. I really was into him. Long story short, He told me he was gonna come see me a few days later and I made a big deal out of it to my podmates and he never showed up. I felt so stupid and I'm sure I looked stupid to them too. Then I found out he was in a relationship. More Sidelinery for me. I'm tired of being the Joseline Hernandez.

I've also learned a few things about Alcohol, Weed, and other Intoxicating things: 1) Some people need that shit to have fun and I think that's lame as fuck. 2) You have to absolutely make sure that if you do decide to get fucked up, you need to make sure you are around people that you trust. Don't find yourself in a awkward position. 

Going to a Leadership Buffet tonight. Time to start my takeover. 

Peace, Love, and Soooooouuuuuuuuul

Titz Berserk

"Off to college

Yes, you went away

Straight from high school

You up and left me

We were close friends

Also lovers

Did everything

For one another

Now you're gone and I'm lost without you here now

But I know I gotta live and make it somehow"

Ahh!!! I've officially moved into Poplar Hall of The University of South Florida! Trey is up in this bitch!!!!

Where do we start? My roomate's name is Sam and he's pretty okay. Ever since we moved in, we both really have been doing our thing. He has a girl named Bonnie and she's cool, I met her once or twice. Most of my podmates (the people in the rooms around mine) are actually pretty okay. I can't really see us wanting to do some of the same things but it's whatever. They actually surprised me because some of them went out clubbing the other night (which I'm jealous of) but I'm guessing it was a cray cray night because there were police and medics walking out of someone's dorm the next morning. I know what happened but I won't disclose it. I've really been chilling with Maya, Chelsea, David, and Alex more so than anyone else. I wanna get to know Rachel and Kit Kat, they always seem to be having fun, and yall know I do some crazy ass shit.

My RA is freaking amazing. I love accents, especially island ones (she's from Barbados). She's very friendly but also very straight-forward. I kinda found myself having some trouble identifying with the people in this dormhall simply because...well, I'll say this: I've been told I live in the "suburbs" of the campus and the Northern section is the more urban area. It sounds strange but when you see the type of people that live in both areas, you can definitely see the difference. Now yall know I love everyone and can clique with anyone regardless of minute details such as race and sexuality, but what I'm saying is that I'm accustomed to hanging around mostly black or latino friends, and I guess I'm trying to put these people into the molds of Diane, Rafael, Jon Jon, Julisa, etc. Speaking of which, I saw this asian boy that reminded me so much of Justin. He was a little more masculine and had nike swag, which is probably why I found him more attractive than Chino. 

Btw, this post will be much more...tongue-held than usual simply because I have to measure its impact. I hope that makes sense. I do have to live with these people until like May sooo.

I'm just really glad to be around open-minded people like forreal. Tired of the ignorance that is Fort Myers. 

You guys know I typically don't be around straight guys like that the ones here are pretty cool. Or maybe they don't know that I'm bisexual? Or maybe they do and just don't care?

And now that I'm thinking about it, this boy named Addison (I think) told one of my friends here that he doesn't like me. BITCH I don't even know you! Fuck iz yu sayin?!

I need to make some rich Middle Eastern friends.

Soooo one of the best things I've experienced since getting here is the Hypnotist Show I went to earlier in the week. It was fucking cray cray. This man had people on stage thinking they were Michael Jackson. I kinda wanted to be up there but oh well. And last night I went to play Manhunt and there was the sexiest guy in the entire campus there. He looked like he might have been a darker blatino and his jaw structure was to-die-for.

Cameltoe.

Going to Ybor with poddies this weekend!!! Wooooo!

I keep going crazy over Big Sean's new song "Milf" but pretty much only over Nicki's verse (duh).

"So what you got for me, Sean?
I heard it's big and its long, 
I'll take my teeth out, suck it good
This where yo dick belong"

Anyway, I sit here and I question the feelings I have/had for Chino. A part of me thinks it was more of convenience seeing as I was always around him. You know how they say "Out of sight, Out of mind"? well yeah, since I haven't seen him and I KNOW I won't be seeing him anytime soon, I haven't really thought of him in that way...

Oh and before I close, Let me show you how to handle an irrelevant, style-lacking, insecure, no-life-having, hating-ass bitch. You couldn't beat me on my worse day, fuck outta here with that bitchassness. You couldn't get the attention of King Vladimir (who would've sent you to the guillotine), but I gladly decided to handle that ass. Love, Pinkie.

Go Away,Trey!

"Who should be hurt? Who should be ashamed? 
Am I supposed to change? Are you supposed to change? 
Who should be hurt? Will we remain? 
You need a resolution, I need a resolution, 
We need a resolution, We have so much confusion. "

As I write this, I feel...unsatisfied. That's the overall feeling I have from last night's party. Think of it like this: You're in an easter egg hunt but you can only find 3 or 4 eggs. You KNOW there's more out there, but you just can't anymore..
Really, this has been my summer. I've been looking for something, and I haven't found it. that might be due to the fact that I really don't know what the hell I'm searching for anyway.

Let me just start from the beginning. When arrived, the usual four were there, including...someone I'll call Thin Ink. I wasn't sure if was coming because of something that occurred in the last few days. Let me explain: Basically he tried to blast me on his status (childish) about a blog that has nothing to do with him, calling me tacky, attention-craving, and mentally unstable. Well I wouldn't say I crave attention but I GET attention, and I like the attention I get. And umm...listen playboy, you don't know just how mentally unstable I am ;) Don't test the kid. However, when I asked him about it, he tried to be very nonchalant and even insinuated that one of his friends felt the same way. They all denied but it still hasn't sit right with me since. I won't worry about it because I get money, make moves, and basically do what I please. Jealousy isn't cute.

"So why was Thin Ink even there?" you might ask. Well I don't know. It didn't matter to me BUT just for future reference. If I don't like you, everything you do and your very presence makes me uncomfortable and annoyed. Please Please Please do NOT make any subtle attempts to talk to me or to get me to talk to you. Don't stand next to me. DO NOT TOUCH ME which means don't put your hand on my side every time you walk by me. I'm so, I'm so, I'm so, I'm so, I'm so proud of Pinkie for controlling himself and remembering that the night was ours and not letting anyone ruin it.

I've recently realized that I really can't do people younger than me and sometimes my own age. All summer I've been surrounded by people older than myself, with the exception of Justin. I used to be attracted to goofiness, the same goofiness I found in Lucas and Justin. But its not what I want now...

So Chino came to my party with some of his friends and I felt that he pretty much forgot what he was even there for. He barely even spoke to me. I danced with him twice, and one time The Greek God joined in. It was...symbolic. There was the smoothness and sexiness I associate with age, and also the fun and electricity I associate with youth. Anyway, Chino left without saying anything at all. He later gave me some weird reason involving pepper spray and burning asses. But, idk. I guess I just really wanted to spend that night
with him.

I was very pissed off at the fact that someone stole Yuleidy-Bug's phone. Like who does that? And I feel dumb because they did it in plain sight. But I'm glad DYM came, they always hold a real nigga down. Brittani too. And Jose. Also glad that my nigga Ralph and Julisa went out to get drinks. I love them so much.

BREAKING NEWS:.....Boys.. If the kid back that thang up on ya, you better act like you know some. Move with it. Grab something. I've danced with studs that can dance better than some of you all. ...Girls...the kid can't fuck witcha if you don't know how to move that thaaaang. I'm done.

Random Sexy pic

I couldn't be with someone that I'm claiming and doesn't claim me. And flirts with everyone. Like everyone.

Overall, I just feel...unsatisfied. I didn't have any toys to play with :/ muahaha that sounds so...deviant. I am so..needing it right now. Something needs to happen in the next two days. My body is ready.

The worse thing about meeting new people is that I know I wont ever see them again. I met Abby last night, and she is maaaaad cool. I love lesbians, we all know this. She's very chill. And we had champagne in honor of me leaving. A nigga poppin bottles now. Levels. But anyway...so glad I met her and was able to finally meet and hang out with Linda.

Overall, I'm ready to leave. When I walked outside of Jojo's last night, I just stood there after I closed the door. I felt as if I had closed the door on a stage of my life. I feel as though everything I had ever done, the people I've met, all have been practice for what is to come. It won't be hard for me to make new friends and such. I feel missed already. People wishing me well, but no one has made me cry..yet. Yanela ALMOST did. But I know exactly who will.

The next post you see will be posted from my dorm room ;)