My Crush on the Greek God And Other Nonsense

This is long overdue. I need to move to Tampa already. I'm getting too comfortable in my surroundings, thus making me uncomfortable. I want everyone to know my name, but not my story, and my story seems to be like a bestseller around these parts. I need the relocation to replenish the vivacity of my soul

Right now, I need one big apple instead of the 6 small ones I'm juggling right now. Wouldn't be easier to hold one big apple, instead of six? Especially if the combined weight of the 6 equals that of the 1?

So, my big crush on JC....I don't know anymore. I'm surprised that he actually went through my pics. Surprised that he liked some and commented one. Surprised that we were messaging. But not surprised that that's where it stopped. I didn't think he would remember that night on my birthday but he did. Turns out he was just as embarrassed as I was, go figure.  I call him a crush because I know I don't have a chance with him. He is like a greek god, everything is just so attractive about him. And that's exactly why I probably couldn't take being with him anyways. There's always like a bajillion (lol) guys trying to get at him on his page. I am that jealous dude. I'm just tripping. And after meeting Jojo tonight ( fun as hell) I don't want to get caught up in something I just can't deal with right now. I guess what I'm saying is: I want somebody that's MY somebody. We don't have to be dating (officially) or have any titles for me to feel like you should be mine and mine only. Maybe I'm trippin.

I don't sweat it because I know my time is coming.

I need more female attention.

So Sid called me around 8 this morning...I don't really understand what his intentions are, but if something is gonna happen then it needs to happen. I mean, he has a girlfriend. Yes, I said that right. No, I'm not a homewrecker. He is in control, but hold on, let me grab the helm.

Yesterday I went to the movies with Dad. It was fun, but at the same time, I feel like I was forced to spend time with him. I know that's not natural and I hate feeling that way. But realistically, he's the one that made me feel that way. And he'll never understand.

It was so hard trying to keep this birthday thing a secret from Myra, but at the same time, it was causing too much stress on all parts. I really like for things to be organized, which is why I just decided to just call her and ask her what she wanted to do and set it up. Not that hard.

Sometimes we let our emotions keep us from making decisions that are ultimately better for our own greater good. What's pleasing in the present may not be such in the future. And trust me when I say a fling is not worth the emotional turmoil after. Is there really such thing as "Friends w/ benefits" and have absolutely no strings attached?

Feel free to comment below. Your thoughts inspire mine.