Frosted Flakes

"Self-righteous, and entitled but they swearing on the Bible that they love you when really they’re no different from all your rivals..But I still don’t wish death on them, I just reflect on them..."

People often ask me why I'm SO obsessed with Nicki Minaj. I usually say something like "I'm not sure, I just am", in order to avoid a long conversation about it. I kind of feel like Nicki and I have developed together. Nicki really started her rap thing in the underground scene when I was in middle school. I like to credit seventh grade as when I started to become who I am today. Much like Nicki, this is really when the people around me saw that I was special. Nicki first appeared in the second semester of my 9th grade year, when my name was really beginning to be known around school. A year later, she releases her first album and I really begin my reign in the school. She brings female rap back, and I bring back the school mascot, along with spanish club and the first ever social inclusion club. She was compared to Lil Kim and I was compared to Tia Smart and Steven Hill (yuck). Moment 4 Life came out and I decided I wanted to make my LIFETIME, that "moment". My Junior year she released her second album, which was more POP. I became Student Body President. This is the point in our careers where everyone either loves this change or hates it. Regardless, we are both successful. Starships came out around my birthday and it really is just a FUN song. This was really the peak of FUN I had in highschool. I was getting all of these crazy opportunities and this is also when I was the CLOSEST to all of my friends. Well due to MJ and her craziness it caused a major split between my all of my friends. Fast forward to October/November of Senior year, Nicki releases "The Re-up" which is the same album with 6 new songs. It was during this time when I re-upped many of my friendships. She put out a song called Freedom which pretty much spoke about her success so far and how other females rappers to come will follow her footsteps. I listened to that song everyday on my way to school for the rest of the year. It just reminded me of what I was going through with the Principal's shit and how I would always win no matter what. It was during my senior year that I was MOST popular and Nicki was on American Idol. We were both exposed to audiences that would not meet someone like us otherwise. Fast forward to now, she's getting ready to release a new album  and I'm getting ready to start a new school year with the same energy I had a year ago, but with experience this time. She has just released Pills N Potions which is a song about still loving people after she has given them everything and they have done her dirty. And that's how I feel about certain people mentioned later on in this blog.

Up and up, I have always admired the fact that although people may consider Nicki stuck up and weird, she is a BOSS and extremely talented. And she has always done what SHE has wanted to do despite the critics.
Although people may consider Trey stuck up and weird, he is a BOSS and extremely talented. And he has always done what HE has wanted to do despite the critics.


When straight boys talk to me about sex...Trey be like


I'm very much bothered that despite being my "best friend", you have not talked to me since we've been back from school. But it's so cool. You and I both know what it really is. You over here chillin with people you don't even like. The fuck? I'm over it yo. It's petals on the wind.

WTF!!!! Okay so I don't ever write these in the order that you read them in. After writing the previous paragraph and almost finishing the blog post, I suddenly thought that I haven't seen any of Rafael's snap stories, then as I go to look, I see that he has removed me from snapchat. Upon further investigation, I found that he has unfollowed on both twitter and instagram also. I'm honestly more hurt than anything. I know I haven't done anything to him. You pulled this same shit two years ago, and I apologized for six months not because I was wrong (I wasn't), but because I valued our friendship. But I'm not doing that again. Ever. I hope I never see you again...Out of sight, out of mind

I WAS THE FUCKING BEST FRIEND YOU EVER HAD!!!

I've learned that when people are truly bothered by something, it's because they have experienced it in the worst way. I recently met a gentlemen who could not STAND people lying to him. Well I eventually found out that his ex lied to him for 3 years straight and gave him HIV. So at that point I deeply understood.

I don't like people flaking out on me. It drives me to tears sometimes. It really just reminds me of all the times my father promised me he would take us on a vacation or even small things like take me to get haircuts but at the last minute, he would back out of those promises. When I asked my mom about why he constantly did this, she told me something that I tell others today. Everyone who truly is my friend has heard me say this: People make time for what they choose to make time for. There is no such thing as being too busy for someone you truly care about. So to this day, when people I care about ask me to do things, and I find my schedule is busy, I always say "Well I have plans already for that period of time, BUT I'm free on this day if you'd like to hangout". That willingness to make time for someone shows that you truly care about them, in my opinion. I only have said "No, I'm busy" to people I truly don't give two fucks about. Think about that.

To be honest, I can't really trust you. I think that alot of people equate trust to someone keeping a secret, but to me, that's what it is at all. Trust is a mutual agreement between two bodies. Its the belief that the other person or entity will always follow through on the things they say they will do..

I said all of that to say this: If you flake out on me the first time we meet, then I mathematically look at it as there is a 100% chance you will flake out because you have done so 1 out of 1 times. The next time we set something up and you actually come through then that's still a 50% chance you'll flake...

I see that life has put me in MANY different situations, alot of which NO ONE knows about. Every time in my life I have ever made a mistake I ALWAYS take from it. I know myself very well which is why I'm able to explain myself...

But I'm Aquarius. So I overanalyze everything.

So for once, I'm actually making progress in my love life. You're starting to become....special to me. I always always always become deeply attached to people fairly quickly. But you're showing me attention..and I like that. But honestly, I want your time. I want you to dedicate a portion of your future time to me, and follow through with the plans. You seem very close to your brother..and that's cool. But just remember this: Your brother can't fuck you.

Ultimately, I wouldn't mind if things eventually became serious between us. But that's only when I see you on a more regular-degular basis.
I mean I'm not afraid to commit, I'm afraid of committing to the wrong person..

I'm used to having bout 4 or 5 niggas on my line. So, really if you wanna be the only one, you're going to have to give me the attention of bout 4 or 5 niggas. I always get what I want. So if I want attention, you better be the one giving it to me..

Seems like you're ready... ;)

I won't even mention how this slow boy at work tried to fight me over two cheezburgers no onion...

Sometimes I think about Joel...I wish circumstances were different. I question the true nature of my feelings towards them and sometimes they seem more...exaggerated. But he belongs to the Army now, and as long as he does, he can't possibly belong to me.

Right now, I just want to be laid out on the beach...drunk out of my mind. Friday. Just wait on it.

#FixItJesus

Go against me I say, "Fix it Jesus"

Thinking they hot, talk shit a lot

But when they shit drop I say "Fix it Jesus"

(Okay so I was supposed to post this like last week but LIFE got in the way. It's mostly still relevant. I'll write any updates in RED)

I rode back home with my cousin (who was incarcerated and missed much of his 20's so now acts much younger than looks). He played Rick Ross and August Alsina SOOOOO loud that the seats were literally giving me a back massage. I couldn't even hear my phone ringing in my hand!!!

I just looked at the Greek God's facebook profile. I haven't spoken to him in a while. I don't mind if he hits me up first, but I think I've put way too much effort into that friendship than he has or ever will. And my hands are still waiting to drag his friend crusty I mean Kenny. LOL I can't be fightin nobody, not until I get this PICC out of me. Then maybe I'll think about ripping your liver out of your body through your fucking throat.

I really want a true relationship. But it wont work. I'm too much of a sexual creature for guys to see me as anything different. Maybe when I'm older and.......less attractive (yeah right).

Tell me how I had 16 different messages on Grindr when I got into town...16!!!
That's 16 different men!! Oh my!

I found out my dad has cancer.

This last weekend I got flaked out on by three different people 3 days in a row....but let's talk about one in specific

Now the only way you would know about Lucas and I is if you truly paid attention to my activity on social media or if we're close friends. I won't give him a nickname, because his name has too much power and emotion associated with it in my mind. Long story short: I spent a vast majority of my senior year chasing him and yearning for his affection. What he did was weird. This is the only way I can describe it: Imagine having a pet dog and only feeding it enough to just barely keep it alive. He feed me affection and shit just enough so I would keep pursuing him. I went through some bullshit with him.
Well we just connected recently, and he's been more open than ever before. "Trey, I've always found you really attractive" and "I miss you soooo much". But he still is about bullshit. We were supposed to chill and then he totally left me hanging the day of, and claimed his phone died, but honestly, there was NO way you could have hit me up? Bullshit. He acts like he's sooo busy for me. Nigga you 16!!! I'm 19 and out of highschool. There is NO way you have more going on than me. When people tell me that theyre busy but don't say what they're doing, that tells me that you're doing something with someone else or something I'd be mad about you doing.

I went and picked him up today. We shared a ....moment. He is so confusing. When were together, its nothing but roses, but otherwise..nothing. Maybe I should just let it go. 

I'm also tired of Jonathan Colon's shenanigans on facebook.
How can someone be sooo wise, but also sooo immature? Use your powers for good, not evil. I still miss him so much. 
I miss Jana.

I'm really feeling someone who's name begins with a D. And for once, not Dickhead. But Idk if he's just trying to be friends. Never really talked to anyone like him before so I don't even know how to flirt with him...We shall just see how it goes. He's mad genuine and..cute. Duh.

Its annoying to be around people who can't have fun without alcohol. To me, that says you have a very boring personality to begin with.

 I see alcohol as an enhancement. It's weird when people totally flip-flop when drunk.

Trey's tweets of the week:

"I would fuck you til your intestines came up through your esophagus and your stomach acid dripped out of your nostrils.."
"I need to carry a shovel with me at all times! #AintYellinCutWhenItsShootinTime"
"I beeen acting like a little bottom aaaall night. *Takes first class flight into Total Top Island* #GayProblems"
"Okay, I don't actually use anal beads and cucumbers tho!"

Now that I'm home, Im ready for a plethora of new guys. Bring on the summer love!

Welp, I'm officially done with the pod. Honestly, everything was so anticlimactic. Some people legitimately just left...like poof. Being the social being that I am, I don't think anyone truly cherished it as much as I did. Having that social interaction allday/everyday...sigh. I'm gonna miss harrassing many of those people (jokingly). I gonna miss smiling to myself when I noticed my vocabulary slip into theirs.

10 Final Thoughts of Pod 3500:

1. I hope those honkies realize that not all black people will be okay with them using the N-word so casually. (Hellooooo double-standards!) Actually 96.7% of them won't be. Not even sure if I am. 
   
2. I wonder how Erin and David will progress outside of the pod. Aww who's David gonna cuddle with over the summer??
   
   
   
   
   
3. Who am I really going to remain close friends with? Honestly....4 people I can think of off the top of my head. There were some people in the pod that I was cool with, but honestly, we would have never been friends had we had not been forced to live together, just because of differences. I love Alex. But we are soooo different. And he goes to bed at 9:30 lmaoo. I always liked that despite that, we were friends because we shared this in common: genuineness. 
4. I'm glad that clique thing is done. Both the Power Rangers and the Size Queens did this thing where sometimes it seemed that no one could make a decision for themselves. It was often very clear the Alex made the decisions for the Power Rangers. No offense to anyone else, but I noticed that Alex ALWAYS made his own decisions and some people would pretty much do what he wanted to do. The bad thing is that Alex didn't realize how much influence he had and sometimes I wished he just kinda sucked it up so that everyone could have fun. 
   
   
   
   
   
5. I feel that the Size Queens were TOO much, but the Power Rangers were  TOO little. I love to go out, but I think there is so much more to do in Tampa and in life in general. And I'm down to chill and watch movies, but not on a friday night. Judge Trey accuses SQ of occasionally going overboard and PR of occasionally being boring! I find you both guilty and sentence you to a lifetime of crustiness!
6. Out of everyone, I truly connected to Theresa the most. She really reminds me of how I was in the months towards the end of my senior year and the subsequent summer before I started college. Someone who is really seen as a "goody-goody" and finally begins to bloom and show everyone who they truly are. Which is something so unexpected to those around us. We both tell it like it is. She puts up with me. And I put up with the wet enchilada between her legs. Lol (insider). 
7. I wish Joycelyn hung out with us more in the second semester. I honestly feel like I kinda forgot who she was and lost the connection I felt with her. 
8. Brendan and I's love connection..Yall just don't understand. His smile...oh lawd *fans crotch* I bet he has good sex. Dumb people always are the best at sexing. *smirks* 

1. Wait, about that last statement. I'm not dumb in the least but my sex is MAGICAL. I'm a pro-hoe ;)
9. The Secret Life of Cedric Torres-Toomey. *cackles wildly*
10. I hope somehow, some way, Jenifer Yeh sees this. On a personal note, I don't have an actual problem or beef with you. You were a good friend when to me, especially on my birthday when everyone else wasn't (we won't get into that). However, I have seen how you acted towards people in the pod, and I'm not really with it. I kind of feel like Alex, David, and Erin ignored how you were being such a...cunt, initially. When you play dirty, you'll never win. You did alot of petty shit,especially to Reese but that's her fight not mine. I don't fuck with people too afraid to tell the damn truth. If you ask Trey, "Yo Trey, you wanna come do this-and-that with me and so-and-so?", Trey finna be like, "Nah brah". Real ass nigga answer. No excuses. Skr8 up. But I'll end with this: You never tried me and just know I was waiting. I was ready to go off like fuckin Hiroshima in this bitch (pardon the asian pun). But you didn't. You and I both know why. By now, everyone knows how you are and anyone that choose to still remain friends with you might be just as messed up as you. 

It all just seems so irrelevant to me now. 

Best Memories, Moments. and Situations:

• The night we met Angelo and Mollie almost hit a homeless guy with first her car then a....well idk wtf it was...
• The Toga Party and Kit Kat's "white lace"
• Bailey breaking the table
• The first Pod turn up
• Andres vs. Joycelyn and Alex
• Aaron feeding KitKat in the kitchen... BLOOP
• Mama T finally gettin some
• Tito and the homeless boy 
• "Grass on Grass, make grow again"
• Big Pink Volleyball
• Cole's car keys
• Theresa "going off" on Alex
• My party at Ralph's
• Mollie vs Rachel
• The Pod vs Summer and Curtis
• David & Katie.....*busts out laughing*
• Megan and Dylan...
• Italy and the choking (though Bailey secretly liked it)
• Bailey and the...."eXXXam"